CB2: My Realization

BEFORE

The painting above has two meanings:

1. the before
2. the after

BEFORE:

Unfortunately I was unable to attend treaty ed camp because of prior commitments so instead I was asked to come up with an answer to the following question: How can you incorporate treaty education into environmental education? So when I say before, I’m referring to before I had to think long and hard about the above question.

So, the bottom half of this photo represents my thought process about treaty education and EE. I used dark colours because how I imagine teaching treaty ed and EE is well, dark and confusing. I know that it is required to incorporate these learnings into everyday teaching but honestly, I don’t really know how. The only thing that runs through my brain are the remarks, “Just tell me and Just show me.” All I want is for someone to tell me what they do or show me some type of game they incorporate into their own classrooms. Instead of picking my brain for answers, I might as well pick someone else’s. And because of this struggle and frustration of not knowing, I came to MY REALIZATION.

AFTER:

Hi Audrey, 

Never mind on the question, I decided to go a different route. Ever Since you told me to think about how I can incorporate treaty ed and environmental education together, my mind has been going around in circles. I have scratched my head multiple times of what I can do. You could probably tell in class when you gave me the question that my head was spinning a million times a second, but I am glad you gave me this one and I am glad I have really struggled at coming up with an answer. Honestly, I haven’t gotten very far, I’ve searched for TED talks about treaty education and incorporating it with environmental education into the classroom, I’ve looked up articles but none really clicked for me. I was going to ask Joseph his thoughts on the environment and then ask one of my roommates (white settler) what they thought about the environment and was going to compare their answers and why they might’ve thought what they did. But that didn’t really work either. While contemplating what I need to do something just clicked. After searching and searching of things I could do, I’ve realized how uncomfortable I have felt. I can’t answer this at the moment because I don’t want to because it makes me uncomfortable. However, I’ve decided that because I feel very uncomfortable with this topic that that is what my creative journal will represent and reflect, my journey of what I don’t know but want to know. I believe the process of learning is to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. 

So I don’t believe that I can fully answer this question because it takes a lot of time, a lot more than just a week. I want to keep informing myself throughout this semester, next year and into my teaching career. As for right now, I will continue to remind myself how important treaty education is and reflect on how I can make sure future students are educated on the correct things about treaty education and environmental education in the right way.  

I hope it was okay to reflect on how I felt towards the question you have asked me. It has been very frustrating for me to answer this because honestly I am not really sure how I can. But because of this struggle I feel I need to over come it, and learn from it. I will continue throughout this semester and really concentrate my time on the question of how I can incorporate treaty and environmental education together. 

Let me know what you think of this,

Ashlee Sandiford

Ps. You’ve been telling us constantly to let ourselves be vulnerable, and now I understand what you mean. This reflection has made me be vulnerable in multiple ways, but that’s good. Thank you.

The above email is my realization. I can’t answer it right away but that doesn’t mean I won’t ever be able to. I am only more motivated and eager to learn in ways that will help me feel comfortable with incorporating treaty ed and EE together. As for my other side of the canvas, it also represents my realization. Again, I used colours that represent my feelings. I feel bright and relieved that I have recognized this processes, this being comfortable with being uncomfortable process is OK. The stick figure on the left (cause I am a terrible painter and need to just stick with the basics) represents myself. The painting shows myself thinking and not knowing the answers. But I decided to put this person on the bright and shining side instead of the before, black side because it isn’t a bad thing to not know. Because of this struggle I have learned that it takes belief and heart. I need to believe that I am a treaty person living in a treaty world and I also need to love that I am a treaty person and living in a treaty world. I have always said and confirmed that I am Canadian, while that is still true instead of defining myself as a Canadian, I can now believe and love that I am a treaty Canadian. Which in turn represents the sign in the middle of my painting. Along with the words Change and treaty. (I was painting this very late and meant to put Choose on the side but accidentally wrote Change again) So I also meant Choose to change. Finally, I can wrap up with what I have learned and how I have changed from trying to answer what I thought was a simple question in terms of Newbery’s article. She states, “creating opportunities for students to learn from and about Aboriginal cultures, while being mindful of idealizing and historicizing them, is an important way of combating the Euro-centrism that pervades educational practice”. Through this quote I have realized two things:

1. Its ok not to know, but in order to grow I must change my mindset, my attitude and my thought process towards treaty education and environmental education
2. What have I changed? My identification. It is so important to believe that what I identify myself as is what I actually love and believe in. Anyone can say “I am a treaty person” but just by saying it doesn’t mean they actually believe it. From now on, I am a treaty Canadian because I want to be. And I believe I am.